Living to Learn

My uncle just died.  It feels weird.  We were not close.  He actually usually scared me a bit.  He was my dad’s only brother.  He was around a bit when Tam and I were young.  But then, his addictions and bitter lifestyle took him away from relationships.  He would occasionally come down for a holiday.  He was homeless for some time in Vegas.  He was a big help when my dad died.  Last year, he was homeless AND very sick, so my mom and Richard went to Vegas, packed him up, and moved him in with them to nurse him back to health.  I have a great deal of respect for Richard for wanting to take care of his wife’s dead husband’s crazy brother, and he did it well.   They transitioned him into his own housing a few months ago.  John helped him get his own car.  Again, he mostly just stayed to himself.  Now, with no real relationships at all, he died quietly with only my mom in the room, just 5 minutes before his long lost grown son (who drove 4 hours) arrived to say good-bye to a dad who mostly hurt him, and never took care of him.  Life is strange sometimes.   I feel sad that my dad’s brother is gone.  I feel sad that he lived his life in a way that separated him from people who could have loved him so much.  I feel glad that the love of Christ is what brought people near him in the end.  I am not sure of his salvation, but he did let my mom pray for him this morning.  How do you deal with this kind of loss?  Dead in his 50s, alone, and very sick due to emphysema, system failure, and infections- still drinking and smoking as he wheeled his oxygen tank around.  Were there people in his life that he impacted positively?  How did God use him?  What is the lesson?  For me, the lesson seems to be a renewed determination to live my life well, so that I can bless others and be surrounded by people I love in my “old” age.  I want my children to rise up and call me blessed.  But, I know that I must live a life that earns that.  And then, prayerfully, the grace of God will cover all of the areas where I fall short.  I am glad my mom has a heart of gold.  She has gone above and beyond on this one.  Having compassion for someone she did not have to because it is the right thing to do.  She was with him the moment he passed.  And she was glad to do it.  Amazing.  God Speed, J.O.. I pray you are reunited with my dad, and you can tell him we miss and love him still today, 7 years later.